Connections

We finally got to eat in dining hall again today. Saw her. Saw everyone. I feel sad not being able to sit with my seniors and chat as we eat like we used to. Sigh. So I guess I'm back to the boring meals cycle (put on headphones, eat, go back).

I received another email from yahoo saying 360blog is closing in a few days. Honestly, I don't like the least bit about it. Having to go through the trouble of creating another blog is one thing, but it's nothing major. It's that blogging just isn't what it used to be. People who would normally comment of my blog posts don't know my new blog address. Blogging using facebook note wasn't an option as I put lots of private stuffs on my blog and there are lots of people I don't want reading my entries. Sigh.

I saw her again today during meal time. Her hair's different from before the holiday. I can't say it's better or not, but she's beautiful as always. But the more I look at her, the sadder I feel just thinking about the fact that I'm so far from her. I met the perfect person. In the wrong place, at the wrong time. I don't know when these feelings will go away, but I know they are killing me everyday. And I thought I was used to unrequited love.

Talking about eating, meals before today have been pretty bad too. Every time I passed through the corridors and see my seniors eating together downstairs, the first thought I had was to bring my food down and eat together with them. But then I would realise the table was more than cramped and it was obvious there was no more space for another person. But somehow when I would eat my instant noodles alone after that, I would regret not coming down.

After writing this entry somehow I'm wishing there's nobody reading my blog, and my sorrow would be all for myself. But then, strangely, part of me is praying that someone will find this entry and read it, and perhaps tell me to cheer up. Perhaps while I hide myself from people, I hope someone could care enough to try and find me...

And somehow after seeing her today I've been listening to nothing but emo music.